SmirkWire

Florida Man Demands Refund After Heat Index Fails to Include Emotional Damage Smart Refrigerator Locks Family Out After Detecting Unauthorized Midnight Cheese County Meeting Ends Early After Microphone Develops Better Ideas Office Promotes Printer After It Successfully Completes One Job Without Assistance Nation Agrees to Pretend Group Chat Notification Never Happened

Fictional Florida man disputing a 112-degree heat index at a weather service counter

World Oddities

Florida Man Demands Refund After Heat Index Fails to Include Emotional Damage

The complaint says “feels like 112” does not adequately describe the betrayal.

Family locked out of a smart refrigerator after unauthorized midnight cheese activity

Technology

Smart Refrigerator Locks Family Out After Detecting Unauthorized Midnight Cheese

County commissioners surprised as a microphone presents a better budget proposal

World Oddities

County Meeting Ends Early After Microphone Develops Better Ideas

Latest Dispatches

A mediator separates relatives arguing over a Thanksgiving gravy boat

World Oddities

Federal Mediator Called After Thanksgiving Gravy Dispute Enters Third Hour

Negotiators established a neutral mashed-potato zone between both sides.

A neighborhood HOA declares independence from the United States

World Oddities

Neighborhood Declares Independence From HOA for Eleven Minutes

Police booking photograph from a corn dog identification dispute

World Oddities

Woman Arrested After Presenting Corn Dog as Identification

An exhausted town clerk beside an overflowing New Year resolution drop box

World Oddities

Town Installs New Year’s Resolution Drop Box, Immediately Files for Overtime

In Other News