Haunted Hayride Liability Waiver Swells to 47 Pages; Farmers Union Calls It ‘Basically a Novel’

HARVESTON — The liability waiver for the Harveston Haunted Hayride has grown to 47 pages this year, prompting the County Farmers Union to issue a statement calling the document “basically a novel, and not a fun one.”

The waiver — which riders must sign before boarding the tractor-pulled wagon — now includes clauses covering startle-induced hat loss, “emotional distress arising from a scarecrow that looks like your ex,” hay-related itching, moonlight exposure, and a two-page section devoted entirely to “the fog machine, and your relationship to the fog machine.”

“Page 31 is just the word ‘fog’ repeated in different legal contexts,” said union representative Bill Hartman, fanning the waiver like a deck of cards. “Fog as a noun. Fog as a verb. Foreseeable fog. Unforeseeable fog. I counted. There are 214 fogs.”

The hayride’s operator, fourth-generation farmer Dale Krebbs, said the waiver’s growth is a direct response to last year’s incident, in which a rider sued after being frightened by a “surprise goat.” The goat, Krebbs stressed, was not part of the haunt. “It was just a goat. It wandered in. It was as scared as he was.”

The lawsuit settled for an undisclosed sum and one (1) formal apology to the goat.

This year’s waiver includes a dedicated Goat Addendum (pages 38-39), which riders must initial separately. “We learned our lesson,” Krebbs said. “Initial the goat page. Everybody initials the goat page.”

Legal experts say the 47-page waiver reflects a broader trend. “Haunted attractions are in an arms race with liability,” said tort law professor Dr. Nancy Ellison. “Every scare is a potential lawsuit. The waiver for the Harveston ride is long, but I’ve seen longer. There’s a haunted corn maze in the next county with a waiver that has footnotes. Footnotes.”

Riders, for their part, seem unfazed. “I signed it,” said teenager Maya Rourke, waiting in line. “I didn’t read it. Nobody reads it. It’s 47 pages. I have homework.”

Krebbs said the waiver will likely grow again next year. “We’re adding a pumpkin-spice clause,” he said. “Someone’s allergic. We don’t know who. But someone.”