Ballot Box Key Inventory Office Reports All 47 Keys Accounted For; One Is Shaped Like a Tiny Dolphin

FRANKLIN — The county’s Ballot Box Key Inventory Office completed its pre-election audit Tuesday, confirming all 47 ballot box keys accounted for, including one shaped like a tiny dolphin, which officials declined to explain.

“Every key is logged, tagged, and stored in the Key Cabinet, which is itself locked with a key that is stored in a separate, smaller cabinet,” said key custodian Harold Vance, whose official title is Keeper of the Keys, a role he describes as “like a fantasy novel, but with more paperwork.”

The dolphin key, which opens Box 12 at the Franklin Community Center, has been in service since 2003. Its origin is unknown. “It was here when I got here,” Vance said. “The tag just says ‘DOLPHIN – DO NOT LOSE.’ In all caps. Underlined twice.”

The audit involves matching each key to its box, testing each lock, and photographing each key “for the key yearbook,” a binder Vance maintains with what colleagues call “concerning tenderness.”

“People laugh,” Vance said, turning the pages of the yearbook, which includes captions like ‘Key 23: a reliable friend’ and ‘Key 31: new this year, very promising.’ “But when a box needs opening at 6 a.m. on Election Day, nobody’s laughing. They’re saying, ‘Thank goodness for Harold and his yearbook.'”

Security protocols require keys to travel in pairs, in sealed pouches, signed out with two signatures and one witness. “The witness is usually Brenda,” Vance said. “Brenda witnesses everything. Brenda is the county’s notary of vibes.”

A petition to officially name the dolphin key “Flipper” has gathered 200 signatures and one very detailed drawing. Vance is “taking it under advisement, which is key-keeper for no, but a respectful no.” The key yearbook’s dolphin entry now includes a sonnet penned by an anonymous staffer: “O Dolphin Key, small guardian of Box Twelve / Your porpoise nose turns tumblers true and well.” Vance called it “the finest thing ever written about a key, and I have read a lot about keys.”

Vance’s key yearbook now has a waiting list for the 2027 edition. “People want to see if Flipper makes the cover,” he said. “No comment.” The dolphin sonnet has been set to music by a local choir and performed twice. “It’s haunting,” Vance admitted. “In a good way. Mostly. It’s about a key.”

The “Flipper” petition now has 400 signatures and a theme song. Vance remains “respectfully noncommittal.” The key yearbook’s second printing sold out. “I’ve ordered a third,” Vance said. “The people love the keys.”

All 47 keys were deployed to precincts by 5:30 a.m. “Zero lost. Zero broken. One dolphin,” Vance said. “I’d call that a perfect audit. The dolphin and I are very proud.”