MAPLE GROVE — The Willow Creek Homeowners Association Halloween Decoration Committee issued 47 citations last week, a full nine days before October, after determining that several residents were guilty of what the committee formally termed “premature spookiness.”
“The bylaws are unambiguous,” said committee chairwoman Deborah Finch, 58, who holds the self-created title of Supreme Adjudicator of Seasonal Appropriateness. “Section 12, paragraph 4, sub-clause B states that no inflatable ghost exceeding four feet may be deployed before October 1st. Mr. Henderson on Elm Street had a nine-foot ghost fully inflated by September 19th. That is not a decoration. That is a provocation.”
Henderson, 44, told reporters the ghost was “just airing out.” The committee was unmoved, fining him $75 and ordering the ghost deflated “in a dignified manner, facing away from the street.”
The citations covered a range of alleged violations, including three counts of excessive cobweb density, one unlicensed fog machine, and what the committee described as “a skeleton posed in a manner suggesting it was waving at traffic, which constitutes an unpermitted greeting display.”
Perhaps most controversial was the citation issued to the Alvarez family for their pumpkin display. “They had seven pumpkins,” Finch explained, consulting a color-coded spreadsheet. “The approved limit is five. Two of the pumpkins were also, and I quote our field inspector, ‘suspiciously round.’ We take gourd uniformity seriously in this neighborhood.”
Field inspector Ron Pruitt, 61, a retired mall security guard who patrols the subdivision in a golf cart equipped with a measuring tape and a laminated copy of the bylaws, defended the crackdown. “People think Halloween is about fun,” Pruitt said, adjusting his reflective vest. “Halloween is about compliance. I measured a spiderweb on Oak Lane at 3.2 webs per square foot. The limit is 2.5. Numbers don’t lie, and neither does my tape measure.”
The committee has also introduced a new pre-approval process for the coming season. Residents wishing to display skeletons taller than six feet must submit Form HD-7, “Application for Oversized Bony Display,” along with a sketch, a lighting plan, and a written statement explaining “the skeleton’s narrative purpose.”
“Last year someone put a skeleton in a lawn chair holding a tiny skeleton coffee mug,” Finch said, shaking her head. “No narrative purpose was filed. We had children asking questions. We cannot have unexplained skeleton leisure activities in Willow Creek.”
Not all residents oppose the measures. “Honestly, it’s nice knowing someone’s watching,” said neighbor Carol Whitfield, 52, whose own display of 14 identical black cats was approved without incident. “Deborah’s tough but fair. My cats are all facing the same direction, as required.”
The committee will hold an emergency session Thursday to address what Finch called “the pumpkin spice situation,” declining to elaborate. Henderson, meanwhile, says he has begun inflating a second, larger ghost. “It’s for November,” he said. “A Thanksgiving ghost. Let’s see them cite that.”
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