Town’s Decorative Corn Maze Declared a Sovereign Nation After Three Residents Get Lost for Six Hours

MILLER FARM — What began as a charming autumn attraction ended in a diplomatic incident Sunday when three residents, lost inside the farm’s decorative corn maze for six hours, voted to declare the maze an independent nation.

The breakaway republic, calling itself the Sovereign State of Stalksylvania, drafted a constitution on the back of a cider coupon, elected a president (retiree Frank Dobbins, 67, “because he had the loudest voice”), and established a national anthem that is just the word “corn” sung to the tune of the national anthem.

“We were cold, we were hungry, and we had achieved self-governance,” said citizen and co-founder Paula Reyes, 44. “You don’t just walk away from that.”

Negotiations at the Food Truck

Farm owner Gus Miller, who found the trio at closing time near the maze’s eastern quadrant, initially attempted to escort them out, but was met with a formal declaration of non-extradition.

“They handed me a leaf with a crayon drawing of a flag,” Miller said. “It was a corn stalk giving a thumbs up. Honestly, the artistry was solid.”

A tense standoff was resolved when Miller offered the delegation free apple cider donuts in exchange for dissolving the republic. After a 20-minute caucus behind a hay bale, Stalksylvania voted 2-1 to accept, with President Dobbins dissenting “on principle.”

Lessons Learned

Miller has since installed an emergency exit lane and a “You Are Here” map at the maze entrance. He has also, at the former citizens’ request, framed the cider-coupon constitution and hung it in the farm store.

“We’re proud of the maze’s difficulty rating,” Miller said. “But next year we’re capping visits at four hours, before anyone forms a government.”

Former President Dobbins says he has no regrets. “Six hours as a head of state,” he said, eating a donut. “Most people never get that.”